The Mean Reds

"Holly: You know those days when you get the mean reds?
Paul: The mean reds, you mean like the blues?
Holly: No. The blues are because you're getting fat and maybe it's been raining too long, you're just sad that's all. The mean reds are horrible. Suddenly you're afraid and you don't know what you're afraid of. Do you ever get that feeling?
Paul: Sure.

Holly: Well, when I get it the only thing that does any good is to jump in a cab and go to Tiffany's. Calms me down right away. The quietness and the proud look of it; nothing very bad could happen to you there. If I could find a real-life place that'd make me feel like Tiffany's, then - then I'd buy some furniture and give the cat a name! "

 I've got the mean reds. I'm scared, scared of failure and not knowing what I'm going to do with my life. Scared of never moving forward. The only thing that calms me down is Tiffany's; it's simplicity and proud look tells me that I don't have to figure out my whole life right now. It's not that I want to become a walking billboard for Tiffany & Co, or that I am genuinely in love with their product. Tiffany's is that reminder of there is always something more; to keep on dreaming. Tiffany's calmed Holly's anxiety when she felt like she wanted to run away, it reminded her of who she wanted to be. I'm not quite sure who I want to be, but when I look at Tiffany's I feel a longing and a fullness. A longing to be a wild thing like Holly, and a fullness of knowing that it's not so bad being caged. In short, Tiffany's is freedom. Tiffany's is a dream. Tiffany's reminds me to calm down and stay when I feel like I want to go somewhere new. It cures my mean reds and gives me a taste of what it would be like to be a wild thing.

If I could find a job path where I felt as passionate as I do with Tiffany's, then I'd decide on a major and go where it took me. But for now, I'm stuck on tiffany.com fighting the mean reds.